Deep Scottish Love

Ahhh... Scotland. Land of haggis and fantastic accents (sidenote: my favourite word for the Scots to say is "ridiculous" - it just sounds ridiculously sexy to me!)

The very next day after Anna and I returned from Spain, I was off on a 3-day guided bus tour of the Scottish Highlands with Joe. After an EPIC game of Squares and sleeping (or trying to) on an overnight bus, we arrived in Edinburgh in the wee hours of the morning. As we wandered from the bus station towards the tour group's office, I started to recognize the sights. I traveled to Edinburgh with Monica and Ernie on my first trip to Europe. And after 9 years, my mental map of the city was surprisingly accurate! After noticing just 2 landmarks (the Walter Scott Monument and the river), I was able to point in the general direction of several others. Well done, brain!!

After meeting our tour guide, Leo (favourite quote: "people will believe anything - you'd be surprised!"), and his guide-in-training, Steve, along with the other 25ish people in our group, we were off!

First stop: the William Wallace (of Mel Gibson and Braveheart fame) Monument. Actually, there was a bit of a running theme all weekend to inform all of us about how grossly inaccurate that film was (for example, the Braveheart nickname was in reality attributed to someone else. They didn't even get the TITLE right!). In any case, the monument is impressively large, and is actually the largest one built for a non-religious figure in the world. So, well done, William.

Back on the bus, we passed through the town of Callander. Probably my favourite random story of the trip was of the gay couple who purchased a hotel in this sleepy little town of traditional and grumpy Scottish folk. They painted it pink and pointedly built the entrance at the rear; needless to say, the locals were NOT impressed. But I sure was!! Callander also boasts a hardware store named "Screw It", which I also find fabulous!

While groovin' to the tunes by "Folkin' Hell" on the bus, Leo took us through a few little historical and/or interesting locations. Like the valley in Glen Lyon where Pontius Pilate was supposedly born. And the property formerly owned by Ian Fleming (the James Bond creator) who ended up selling it to none-other-than Sean Connery! And then there's Loch Garry (the very same name as the only Scottish person I know), which is shaped a bit like the country itself.

We also saw a few cairns, which really just look like a bunch of rocks heaped on top of each other. But they're actually much more interesting than that. Historically, when soldiers went off to battle, each one would pick up a stone and place it in the pile. When they came back from the war, they'd take one off and toss it away. This served as a handy way to count the casualties of the war, while simultaneously creating a little memorial to those who lost their lives.

Finally, we reached Loch Ness. This was actually the realization of a dream for both Joe and I. He'd been to Scotland twice before and hadn't made it to see Nessie, and I came with Monica, but... well let's just say we didn't really see it. Our whole group went out on a boat cruise of the Loch, which was quite fun. Very much a "we made it!!" moment for Joe and I. About halfway through the cruise, we were invited downstairs so the boat's owner and captain could give us a little more information about the Monster. This guy was born and has lived on Loch Ness his whole life. He goes out kayaking searching for the Monster on a regular basis. And he's got crazy sonar scanning equipment on the boat so he can take readings of her. This guy is intense. I have to say, some of the evidence is compelling. And he's got photos of sonar readings that do seem to show SOMETHING pretty massive and fast. But let's be honest, he's also a bit of a nutter. In any case, it was fascinating to hear him speak with such passion about the existence of something so contested. Oh, and he also claims to have a photo that he's been offered $1million for... Right.

The next day of the tour was spent on the Isle of Skye. I'd never been there before, nor had I ever really had any particular intention to visit it, but it was actually quite nice. Rolling hills, gorgeous scenery, and a little fairy magic.

We also stopped beside a stream that is rumoured to make anyone who dips their face in it for 7 seconds wildly beautiful with unfading good looks. Don't believe me? Just check out the magic it did on Joe:

The last day of our trek took us to the Culloden battlefield. While this was admittedly quite sobering, it falls under the category of "interesting history" (which I define as learning about something right where it actually happened). Here, the Jacobites fought not only for their freedom, but also for the preservation of their way of life. Led by the bonny Prince Charlie, these Highlanders went up against George I of England. George intended to completely wipe them out, and pretty much succeeded. Prince Charlie, who had been in exile for quite some time, was unfamiiar with the Jacobite war tactics; as a result, they were unorganized on the battlefield. They were also ridiculously outnumbered. The Highlanders were decimated in about 45min. Custom at the time allowed the wounded to be collected and tended to by the tribe's women; however, George was serious about stamping these people out. He closed the battlefield and the entire Jacobean army perished. There are stones embedded in the wall of the centre on-site to commemorate all the dead; 40 are for the government soldiers and 1600 are for the Highlanders.

This battle is actually quite significant in terms of history. Of course, the failure of the Highlanders at Culloden completely changed their way of life. The rebellion was stamped out and they were forced to adhere to George I and his laws. But also, George and his successors were power-hungry and conscious of the lands they possessed. He advanced England dramatically in terms of its empire and presence in Europe. Prince Charlie, on the other hand, was much less focused on building an empire. Had he been successful at Culloden and overtaken George I, England would very likely have been a much weaker force in Europe. In fact, you'd probably even be reading this in French!

All in all, it was a pretty great way to spend Easter weekend. Having said that, I didn't like not being able to attend a church service on Easter Sunday and I don't think I'd plan to be away on that weekend again. But the guided tour part (and the traveling with Joe part) were a bit of a test for the upcoming trip to Vietnam. And both items definitely passed the test! In fact, the bar has now been set pretty high!